What am I angry at?
Most of all, I’m angry at Christians. We’ve let all these other things come between our God and the life that he calls us to. For some reason, being a Christian has been reduced to your ability to memorize scripture, read books, and to manage your sin. The Gospel of Sin Management has taken place of God’s Gospel of Love & Grace. I’m angry at our inability to lead with humility, with vulnerability, and with honesty. As Christians, we’ve removed ourselves from the world in which we’re called to serve. Christians have forgotten how to love. Both within the Church, and outside of that communion, we’ve segregated ourselves from a deeply broken world, a world which doesn’t respond to fear of Hell, but a world which deeply longs to feel the intimate love of the Lord.
We don’t preach the ‘Good News’ to keep people from going to Hell. We’re called to share in the love of the Lord so that others may find themselves closer to God than they were before. Christians have idolized Hell itself. Our God is a loving God, one who weeps over our distance from him, not this wrathful being who wants to cast down his children to an eternal pit when they don’t cry out his name. Make no mistake, our God is just, but how belittling to his power to reduce him to this vengeful, ruthless father who leaves his children. I know what it’s like to be lacking a father figure, a real one, and I’ve also come to see just how much love he has for me. He longs to fill the void within my being. He longs to be my source of validation.
I’m angry at Christians and I’m angry at myself. We have failed to serve in everything. In our vocation, in our homes, in our communities, in our cities, in our walk. The Christianity of American Independence has neglected the call to surrender as Jesus commands us. Christians, perhaps more than anyone, perpetrate racism, segregation, individualization, and the Gospel of Prosperity more than anyone. I am jaded, and I am jaded because I’ve seen communities broken by ideologies directly defiant of Jesus’s message of love. I’m not sure when guns became part of the church. I’m not sure when Christians began hating homosexuals. I’m not sure when being a Christian meant being a Republican. I’m not sure when Christians decided to neglect the Earth we’ve been blessed with. I’m not sure when Christians decided to quit living in community in exchange for a stick-framed house sitting on three lonely acres of fescue. I’m not sure when Christians devised a system to achieve salvation, to live a formulaic life that says A+B+No Sin = God.
What happened to the Christians who went out into the world, who displaced themselves to serve the destitute, the impoverished, the trafficked, not to fulfill some salvation quota, but wholly to serve God’s children as we’ve been called. Our God longs for us to cry out to him for help, but why would we need to when we make a life for ourselves based wholly on some desire for comfort? We will never be comfortable until we fully submit ourselves, surrender ourselves to the Lord, seeking out his peace and his grace. Once we fully put to death our lives of busyness, only then, may we fully experience the love and joy of God in its fullness.
I long so deeply for the day when we enter into the new earth, but that Kingdom is here! It is with us already. What good does it do to wait for the day which we’ll ‘fly away’ to heaven when the Kingdom of God is already here!? I wait patiently for the return of the Lord, but not waiting in some apathetic, passive sense. I will wait actively, trying my best, as an example of God’s Kingdom here, as it is already with us! Our call to action is now.